It was your child's first time to attend school. He seemed excited at first, but got anxious when you were about to leave. Things got really distressing when you left the classroom and heard a loud cry. It has been a week since your child attended school and the horrible screams and outbursts have continued. You know your boy does not want to be separated from you. What should you do?

Separation anxiety in children often causes parents to worry - it can be heart-breaking, comical, or even maddening at times. Unknown to many parents, this condition is a completely normal developmental milestone. You may not head off every tearful goodbye or leg-cling, but you can do something to ease your child's separation anxiety.

Practice separation

One way to ease your child's anxious behavior is to practice separation for short distances and time, increasing as he or she can tolerate it. Praise your child for managing the separation well. If your child initiates separation by going into another room, go after him after a few minutes. This will enhance your child's sense of independence.

Make new environment familiar

Make sure that your child is comfortable with new environments with you present. For example, the first time you leave your child in a school should not be the first time your child has visited that school. Let your child familiarize himself or herself with his new surroundings. Allow the child to bring his or her favorite objects.

Show your child a calm and positive attitude

Children are sensitive to their parents' moods and will feel any tension in your face, voice, gestures, or touch. Do not give in to your child's outbursts or pleading eyes, which are only a trick to keep you from leaving. Running back when your child cries just reinforces his or her separation anxiety.

Develop a goodbye ritual

Rituals can be reassuring and calming. It can be as simple as a comforting kiss or a special wave. Many parents develop cute goodbye rituals. A mother said, "I plant a kiss on my daughter's palm and it comforts her to know a part of mom is with her during the day."

A mother has developed an effective goodbye game, "Every morning before school, I pull out 10 cards showing a picture of lips (indicating a kiss) and a mom hugging a child. Next to each picture there is a number, which tells my daughter how many kisses and hugs she will get from mommy. Every morning I shuffle the cards and have her choose one. We exchange kisses and hugs and she goes to school much happier."

5. Assure your child that you will be back

Comfort your child by saying that you will come back. When you are leaving, say goodbye and tell him or her that you will be back. Then go. Do not repeat or stall goodbyes as it will only make your child more clingy. Tell your child that you need to go to work or do something and that you will return in terms he or she can understand. Do not leave without saying goodbye. Doing so will only undermine your child's sense that he or she can rely on you.