Your son or daughter's teenage years can pose some difficult challenges for the family. This is expected. When we were younger, we also had some kind of conflicts with our parents at some point. They had us grounded when we did something wrong at school or when we came home late. And we hated. Now, as parents, we impose some discipline measures when our teens come home drunk or with a black eye. And we know they do not like it.

Teens face a lot of difficulties. Parents, too, are having hard times dealing with the concerns and problems of their children. Fostering a good parent-teen relationship is a real challenge.

Dealing with changes

Teens deal with hormonal changes. They are also coming of age and begin to see and experience an ever-complex world. This often leaves them confused. Many of them feel that no one truly understands their feelings, most especially their parents. As a result, they may feel angry and alone while confronting complicated issues on peers, identity, drinking and drugs, romantic relationships, and sexual behavior.

Parents, on the other hand, may be angry and frustrated that their teens no longer respond to their authority. As a result, they impose outdated methods of discipline that are no longer effective. In addition, parents may feel helpless and frightened about the brash choices and decisions of their children.

Parent-teen conflicts

With the many changes happening during the teenage years, and the difficulties of both teens and parents in dealing with these changes, it is no wonder why conflicts in the family arise. There are many areas of such conflicts. These may include the teen's choice of friends, dating and sexuality, school and work performance, and cars and driving privileges.

Teens and parents also often clash over the teen's curfew, the teen's time spent with peers versus family, and their clothing, makeup, and hair styles. Self-destructive behaviors like drinking, smoking, and using illicit drugs are also sources of a parent-teen conflict. Even small things like choice of music can trigger conflict.

Guiding the teens

Dealing with the teen's issues can be very challenging for all concerned. However, it is the parents that are generally successful and effective at helping the teen accomplish his or her developmental goals. Parents should guide their teens to become less dependent on them, while becoming increasingly responsible for their own lives.

When things get out of hand

There are many warning signs that do not go really well and that parents may want to seek professional help. These signs include violence or aggressive behavior by the teen, promiscuity, substance abuse, school truancy, runaway behavior, or brushes with the law. Another strong warning sign is when a parent shows violent behavior in attempts at maintaining discipline.